Rainbow Reviews

BOOK BLURB:
Marcus was just passing through Texas when he met Kent. In his cowboy hat, low-riding jeans, and black boots, Kent looks like the type of guy Marcus desperately wants to love.

But two years later, he's discovered Kent is cold and distant, the quintessential American cowboy, and spends more time drunk than sober. Marcus can never predict his mood and blames himself for the flailing relationship.

Then, one day when Kent rides into town, Marcus finds a young runaway hiding in their barn. Luke is warm, loving, and quick to please...everything Kent is not. Though the answer seems obvious, Marcus finds himself torn between the boy who demands his love and the man whose love he craves.

BOOK REVIEW:
How do you know that you are loved? Is it through words or actions? When have you tried long, and hard, enough to make a relationship work? What makes you decide that you need, and deserve, something more?

These are all questions plaguing Marcus, the main character of Cowboy. For two years, he has been living and working alongside Kent. They sleep in separate bedrooms and have infrequent sex, at the mercy of whatever alcohol Kent has most recently imbibed. Marcus has convinced himself that he is happy with his life, grasping at any hint of affection or intimacy from Kent.

When Luke enters his life, Marcus begins to question everything he knows. The boy is so open with his feelings and desires, and thrives on physical contact of any kind. Luke is the antithesis of Kent in just about every way possible. He is everything that Kent isn’t, and everything that Marcus desires.

As Marcus’ feelings for Luke intensify, he is torn between the two men. Does he stay with Kent, the man he has cared for and loved for so long, that is everything he thought he wanted, or does he leave with Luke to a future that is full of unknowns?

This is not your typical cowboy story and it is a commanding analysis of what it means to be loved. Snyder has created a gut-wrenching portrayal of a man struggling to choose between two men. This is no easy decision for Marcus. He fights feelings of inadequacy, failure, regret, and lost hope in his desire to make the "right" decision. He doesn’t want to hurt either man, but in the end he can only be with one of them.

Snyder’s descriptions of Marcus’ struggle are powerful and intense, capturing with words the anguish and deep emotions which are engulfing him. Some of my favorite passages, which relate so much with so few words, are:

“I’m caught in the middle, because despite the way I feel for one, I can’t help but want the other.”

“I love who I think he could be, and that’s not something I’m ready to throw away just yet.”

“He just doesn’t see me, he can’t, he won’t…”

I was captured by Marcus from the beginning and I was on edge about what would happen until the very end. It was so easy to identify with the character, whose heart and soul are spilled across every page. At the same time, I was drawn to both Kent and Luke, never completely sure who was the right person for Marcus to be with.

Cowboy is very different from many of Snyder’s others stories. It focuses on a painful emotional journey, which results in a gripping story that should not be missed. If you are a fan of Snyder’s work, be sure to read this story to fully realize the range of her talent.

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